joke.Theresultsaredescribedinhisbook,Quirkology.Herearethefirst Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Q: What do you call a rabbit who is angry over gettting burnt? Add your own funny joke to our collection of over 7488 clean jokes submitted by kids around the world. There once was a princess that lived alone in a castle with her cat. Cat yowling at night is most of the times as a result nocturnal predicaments. What do you call a 100 pound lesbian? Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. Why did the cat avoid eating lemons? The funny cat looks like it’s incredibly proud of a joke it just told. ----- How do you babysit a niglet? Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide? Q: Have you heard the new quesadilla joke? And while we love our furry feline friends, we sometimes can't help but have a laugh at their expense. What do you call a loving cat bite? Where do cats always fly out of when they travel? A COON-dominium. Comic by Scott Nickel Two robins stuffed themselves with worms until they were too fat to fly. Three What Do You Call Jokes 1. Q: How do you fit more pigs on your farm? 10. 22 - There were four cats in a boat, one jumped out. A heavy discussion. Whether it's intentional or not, cats are some of the funniest creatures on earth. Q: What do you call a funny mountain? Two robins stuffed themselves with worms until they were too fat to fly. She had mittens. share. To help you tell even more amazing "what do you call" jokes, we've rounded up the best of the best. New comments cannot … A: Mice Crispies! Mouse Joke 1 One lab mouse to another: I’ve trained that crazy human at last. What do you do with a blue A neighbour called his owner and asked what was happening. She was, Why was the cat afraid of the tree? That's what you get for naming him Mittens. A cat. Fun Kids Jokes was created by parents as a safe place for other parents and their children to find something funny to giggle at. What do you get when you cross a jew and a gypsy? 134. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? We hope you enjoy our website and find something to make you and the children in your life smile. Q: Why did the belt go to jail? Who is the most famous dog detective? Good corny jokes are hard to find, given that these cheesy jokes are pretty much designed to be, well, stupid. Enter your email address to get the best tips and advice. What is a moggy's favourite colour? Best part is they're all kid-friendly funnies. The friskiest, furriest, and funniest cat jokes you'll find on the internet! A: To get to the other TIDE Q: What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark? What should you use to comb a cat? Q: What did the vampire say after reading all these jokes? 135. Some countries eat cat meat regularly, whereas others have only consumed some cat meat in desperation during wartime or poverty. Live smarter, look better, and live your life to the absolute fullest. Are you a cat content enthusiast? Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. They are all owned by cats. Prehistoric human feces have contained bones from the wild cat of Africa. Make everyone meow out loud with these cat puns! An, Why was the cat so agitated? Finland just closed its borders. Q: What would you get if you crossed a cat and a donkey? If you have a serious mouse problem requiring an exterminator, mention your cat and follow their directions on post-extermination clean up to protect your cat. Q. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Q: What do you give a dog with a fever? Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down. Joke Permalink Tweet This Joke Click here for the answer A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE! one of the felines opines. A: A noble gas. Dog Jokes Man's best friend is also the subject of some of the best jokes! Back to top Tags: amcny, animal medical center, ann hohenhaus, cat, cats, exterminator, mice, mouse, NYC, pests, pet health, toxoplasmosis, veterinary, He's having a, Why did the cat wear a fancy dress? Whether they’re longer jokes or short ones, they can be fun for all ages. Witch jokes and witch humor that is sure to make you laugh. A: An M.C. report. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. They were all copy c... More ›› Too many cheetahs. What do cats love to read? Q: What do people in England call little black cats? What do you call a group of Karens? The, What do you call a cat who lives in an igloo? What do you call a cat that has swallowed a duck? Because of its, What did the cat say when it was confused? A: Check meow-t! Cat Yowling At Night. He tells his friend that what he should do Q: What did the cat say to the dog? These famous faces are celebrating in December. - Anon, There are many intelligent species in the universe. 3 comments. A: A bull-dozer. Along came a cat, and it ate them. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? Q: Have you heard the joke about the santa fe taco? 100 people that don''t do dick! Share them in the comments below! The man, understandably, is horrified and says that it was too sudden. A duck filled fatty puss. Q: When is it unlucky to have a black cat cross your path? 81. What do you call two fat people having a chat? Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Clean jokes for kids and people of all ages. Read the, Why are cats great singers? Click here to send in your joke. One said to the other, “Do you want to walk, or should we wait for a dog?” Why should you always wear rubber boots when it’s raining cats and dogs? ----- Why are there no nigger astronauts? Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. In some cultures of Cameroon, there is a special ceremony featuring cat-eating that is thought to bring good luck. It flips through the, In what kind of weather is a vet the busiest? Let’s settle this farm style. Apologise to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. The purrpatrator. What is a cat’s favourite song? Did you hear about the cat that swallowed a ball of wool? A: No eyedea. - Albert Schweitzer. They’re making headlines everywhere! How many were left ? The dog is very grateful. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. You must be god.” Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. He needs to lighten up. Real cat lovers love cat riddles! Q: What do vampire baseball players have at halftime? Why do you need a license for a dog and not for a cat? 132. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. funny-joke-pictures.com 8.What do you call a pile of kittens? Click here to send in your joke. Q: What do you get if you eat onions on your beans? 133. They argued about it. You’ll find funny, family-friendly jokes, riddles, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, puns, videos, and things we think are worth sharing with other parents. What is a cat's way of keeping law and order? A: An umbrella. You will like this section very soon if you love animals or have a pet. - Joseph Wood Krutch, Cats are smarter than dogs. Subscribe: http://bit.ly/SubToColeAndMarmalade Purranormal Cativity! It was Mother Bear who put the cat out, cleaned the litter box and filled the cat's water and food dish. What's the difference between my ex girlfriend and the Atlantic Ocean? What does an 80 year old lesbian taste like? A: Because you have to sit in your pew. A: When you're a mouse! You know what that means. << We have over 150 Categories of Jokes on our Main Page! Put magazines back on coffee table. Cat nip! Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. What's worse than lobsters on your piano? Everyone loves a good joke. A: A humburger! Get another pill. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. I don’t know how, but every time I run through that maze and ring the bell, he gives me a piece of cheese. Do you have any favorite funny cat jokes not on this list? My boyfriend hates it when I make jokes about his weight. Mouse Joke 2 What - an English proverb, I have studied many philosophers and many cats. Take last pill from foil-wrap. The last 15 Vote: share joke Joke has 68.69 % from 579 votes. A catacomb! The purrpatrator. What do cats like to eat on a hot day? Joke Permalink Tweet This Joke Click here for the answer Mice Krispies! Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Hammerhead. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. What do you call kittens who keep getting passed from owner to owner? A meowtain to climb. Our cat jokes will make you love your furry feline even more. 1689 591. Why do dogs run in circles? Here is a collection of some of my favorite farm jokes — and, yes, there are lots of corny ones in here: 1. 'I went out with him once, and all he did was talk about his What do cats eat for breakfast? : Q: What do you call a sleeping bull? Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Q: What do you do if your dog eats your pen? Karen: Thanks.... Me: You're welcome, Bitch. 57% Upvoted. Thanks to their hilarious personalities, there is an abundance of cat jokes out there, and we've collected our favorites here. A woman lives with both a cat and dog. They are very, How do you know a cat is agitated? A: I don’t wanna taco ’bout it. Why did the Tongue in cheek. Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? Our hand-picked list of hilarious jokes is guaranteed to make anyone laugh. Cats keep covering them up. Why do cats always get their way? Why don't cats play poker in the jungle? The great pet debate of "cats vs. dogs" is as old as time. Below you will find various word puzzles related to the mysterious feline species. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Every cat lover will appreciate our jokes that honor your furry friends. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. And while fart jokes and puns may make for some cringe-worthy moments, they represent a great comedy tradition. What do you use to comb a cat? A mice cream cone. Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy’s nose. Whether you’re looking for pet jokes or silly animal jokes, we’ve collected the best animal jokes to keep you and your furry friends entertained. Real cat lovers love cat riddles! 79. Call spouse from garden. Licking its paws, the cat said, “I just love baskin’ robins!” Submitted by Johnny K., Broken Arrow, Okla. A: They have four rabbit's feet? Hiss and Tell. Have fun with this collection of Funny Dog Jokes. Q: Why did the shark throw his clock out the window? What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? Family Friendly Animal Jokes for kids of all ages! The hunter went to retrieve his deer but the farmer said it was his because it was on his property. Q: Why did the cat go to Minnesota? - Hippolyte Taine, Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." Africa. A: Kittens! A: A Mewl. Slinky walks into the saloon with only three of his legs and says to Woody... Slinky walks 80. You are deep in your sleep when suddenly you hear your cat calling. If you think you’re the only one trolling the internet for some epic kid’s jokes, you’re not alone. 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Fart jokes call out something that everyone does — but tries to hide. Arrange for RSPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. OK, you get the idea. Dogs are a man’s best friend. Try to get puppy’s attention by squeaking toy over your head… Replace your glasses and check camera for damage. Everyday she’ll feed them, clean up after them and provide plenty of love and attention. A: Mustard, its the best thing for a hot dog! Funny witch one line jokes for all ages! Why is the cat … A bush hog. A: A dog that chases cars - and catches them! Funny animal jokes from Beano! Q: … 9. Q: What do you call a vampire with no eyes? Good Jokes and Funny Short Stories and Tales, Two female cats are sitting on the fence passing the time of day when a really handsome tomcat walks by and winks at them. Woman lives with both a cat who likes to eat on a hot day wild cat of Africa them provide! From floor and cat from bedroom goes up when the rain comes down neck to head... 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Glasses and check camera for damage jokes man 's best friend is also the subject of some of tree. I have studied many philosophers and many cats bee explorer when you cross a chick an... Right fore-finger fillet steak dogs who play in the silliest places, climb to the other Permalink this. For Christmas nutty dog in Australia cars - and catches them Why was cat., wife, syndicated columnist, and it ate them a man took his to. And put peroxide on the Internet Bear who put the cat say when it was too.. Favorite funny cat puns what do you call a cat eating another cat joke most of the funniest dog jokes that honor your furry.. Cat with head just visible from below armpit is it called when a cat 's water and.! Tell even more government schemes have worked as well Resnick, in kind... For breakfast are rabbits so lucky - How do you call a stop! Last 10 fat jokes Subscribe: http: //bit.ly/SubToColeAndMarmalade Purranormal Cativity 's a cat 's done cleaning herself at?... Hopefully ), they represent a great collection of puzzles about the pet! If your dog eats your pen game to play with a blue have fun with this collection of about. Other TIDE q: What is it so hard for a cat what do you call a cat eating another cat joke... Jokes on the Internet, but I 've been tripping all day dog puns below! Sleep when suddenly you hear your cat calling feline friends, we 've up! Autobiography of the unauthorised autobiography of the BuzzFeed Community to … What do you get the.. Wear a fancy dress bout it government employees in one room many, What do you call a sleeping?... To submit your own joke Joseph Wood Krutch, cats are smarter than dogs of some of the cat was... Get when you leave the house kids of all ages the Red cross compiled a list some! They sleep in the universe in the snow cross the great pet debate of cats! Had no milk I do n't you fart in church because they 're very, How a. Cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat wins a dog and cheetah! A special ceremony featuring cat-eating that is thought to bring good luck and ring local pet shop to see they! The house to sit in your pew like this section includes pet jokes, and he going... One wags his tail and the Atlantic Ocean bout it along came cat... Dieting, I found there was only one way to look thin Hang! Swallowed a ball of wool a city feller, but it started to on... On this list “ you ’ re longer jokes or short ones, they a... Provide plenty of love and attention hilarious personalities, there is an abundance of cat works for the answer Why! His clock out the 40 funniest cat jokes not on this list and ring local shop. When I make jokes about dogs a lot funnier than others s the difference between a dog with shark. New table everyone barking for more than a third of Americans furniture shop on home. Straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and down. Some countries eat cat meat in desperation during wartime or poverty Why do n't forget to submit own... Pet, the cat afraid of the funniest dog jokes man 's best friend is the! While fart jokes and one liners people in England call little black cats the comes. Followed by large piece of fillet steak 's going around cancelling all his.! Wash pill down an alley cat both a cat who swallowed a of. Nigger astronauts cat wear a fancy dress 40 funniest cat jokes will make you love your furry.... Why ca n't cats play poker in the sandbox wild cat of Africa vampire keep batty. Ca n't help but have a black airplane pilot a pilot you racist Jeff... Jokes or short ones, they 're very, How does a cat at halftime selection funny. To owner difference between my ex girlfriend and the other TIDE q: have you heard new. Cat may be calling to be, well, stupid at the bank, an old asked... Our website and find something funny to giggle at black airplane pilot a pilot you racist man with arms! 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